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How to make Quality Friends

What is Friendship? 

Friendship is a close and platonic relationship between two or more people marked by feelings of care, respect, and loyalty. Oftentimes, people diminish the importance of having friendships but this is a necessity in ones’ life.  

“An Enemy might be able to defeat one person, but two people can stand back-to-back to defend each other. And three people are even stronger. They are like a rope that has three parts wrapped together—it is very hard to break.” ~Ecc 4:12

In the Washington post they mentioned that 3.4 million people were evaluated across 70 studies, and found that the absence of social interactions carried the same health risk as smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day. 

Throughout my 24 years of life, I’ve been through various friendships, good and bad. Even though the bad friendships caused me pain, I don’t regret them. All the pain I’ve experienced taught me valuable lessons. If you are a person who finds it difficult to make quality friends, this is the right blog post for you. 

4 WAYS TO MAKE QUALITY FRIENDS: 

1. Go to Events of your Interest/Join Groups 

Yes, this sounds scary, but this is how I’ve made my closest friends. Making friends in school is difficult because it’s filled with people who stick within their friend groups. 

I’ve noticed that when I started going out on my own to concerts/shows, I started making a lot of friends. It’s insane how much you can have in common with those you meet there. If you support an artist who genuinely seems like a loving person, their fans often resemble the same positive qualities.

2. DON’T AVOID RED FLAGS

This is important in order to avoid forming toxic friendships. 

Some red flags are:

  • Constantly cancelling plans/Breaking promises 
  • Lack of communication 
  • Only communicate/hang out with you when they need you!
  • Inconsiderate of your feelings/Self-absorbed
  •  

    A friendship should NEVER be one-sided, if you are making sacrifices within the friendship and they aren’t reciprocating that same energy, then you may want to end it. The only difference between a romantic relationship and a friendship is that it’s platonic. This means that you should give your friendships, your all. 

    3. Be Vulnerable

    This is easier said than done, but the more you open up, the deeper the friendship will be. When you engage in deep conversations with someone you understand them more. You find similarities that are deeply rooted and which forms stronger relationships. When you listen to how they view life, it can either be a good thing or deal breaker for maintaining a friendship. What’s on the surface always looks beautiful but when you find out what’s underneath, you may not view it the same way. You want friends you know won’t judge you, even when they know all your darkest secrets. Someone who won’t use your flaws against you, but instead use them to uplift you.

    4. Lastly, BE YOURSELF! You find the most meaningful and everlasting friendships, when you’re just being yourself. Being in your true form, attract you to those who are like you or similar in most ways. When you pretend to be something else you form friendships that are out of your element and you won’t be fulfilled. Friendships aren’t about quantity it’s about quality. If you pretend to be someone that you are not, eventually the character you are pretending to be will break out of her role and the ones who claimed to be her “friends” will leave. ALWAYS BE AUTHENTIC, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL JUST THE WAY YOU ARE.

    -Judith Ulysse, AngeLink Social Ambassador